My Hero Academia Crack One Shots
by DragonStorm88
Summary: This is a collection of silly MHA one shots I write in my spare time (and also my first time posting here). This is just for fun, but please feel free to let me know if i made a mistake anywhere. It’ll help me grow and make these better. Also on Wattpad
1. Custody Battle: Dad Might vs Dadzawa

Custody Battle: Dad Might vs Dadzawa

Shouto had no idea how he'd ended up in this situation. It started off like any other day, with classes going as per usual, until All Might and Mr. Aizawa walked through the door of the classroom (rolled through in a sleeping bag in Aizawa's case) having an intense debate. Was that the word 'father' he heard? What was going on? The next thing he knew, Shouto was squeezed between Midoriya and Yoayorozu in a court room, while as best as he could figure, All Might and Mr. Aizawa we're having a court battle over... them?

Not only was all of Class 1-A was crammed into the seats with him, that general studies student from the sports festival, the big three, as well as that Eri girl Midoriya and the others had rescued were also there.

Next to him, Yoayorozu shook herself out of her confused state of shock.

"What's going on?" She said. Midoriya looked at her from across Shouto

"I think All Might And Mr. Aizawa are in a custody battle over us..." he trailed off.

Shouto smiled. "I'm ok with this," he said. Midoriya placed a hand on his shoulder with a comforting look. On his other side, Uraraka spoke up,

"But what about our actual parents?"All Might and Aizawa, apparently hearing her question, turned in unison and said,

"Well obviously it'd be a split custody"

"Oh" Uraraka replied, blinking confusedly, "Ok."

All Might and Mr. Aizawa has already gone back to arguing back and forth in front of a shocked looking Judge. Shouto smiled again. Ya, he was ok with this either way.

Finally the Judge shook off his shock, and banged his gavel to stop the arguing heroes. "ORDER!!!!" He yelled, before continuing more calmly,

"Please, one at a time, explain to me what's going on? Eraser Head, if you will?"

"Rationally speaking, to protect our students from the increasing threat from the league of villains, it's only logical we become legal guardians, since we're already doing so," Mr. Aizawa monotoned. "My colleague will be by shortly to officially adopt his Class 1-B as well, our problem is that All Might and myself cannot come to an agreement as to who should watch over this Hell Class."

"But why are there other students here?" Asked the judge.

"We like them too," came All Might's reply. "Oh. Well why don't you just split the custody like you suggested with their actual parents" Intoned the Judge.

From somewhere behind him, Shouto heard Kaminari gasp and whisper incredulously,

"He's actually going along with this?" He gasped again. If he had to guess, Shouto would have to say Jiro had jabbed him with her earphone jacks. It also helped that she responded,

"They're pro heroes Jamming Whey, they have a lot of credibility to their names."

Next to Shouto, Midoriya has fainted, the idea of All Might adopting him clearly too much to comprehend. Uraraka was rubbing soothing circles on his hand and preventing him from falling out of his chair. Apparently, All Might and Mr. Aizawa hadn't thought of the judges suggestion. They looked at each other in surprise.

"Ya, that'll work," they said together.

Shouto looked around to see the others reactions. The big three students seemed to be taking this in stride. Was this common at UA? The Gen Ed student seemed to be sleeping. Good for him, he looked tired. The Little girl Eri was barely containing herself in the excitement of the prospect of a real family.

His Classmates has varying reactions. Some like Kirishima and Mina were clearly excited, if not a little confused. Mineta, the gross perverse dumbass he is, was looking like an idiot, as per usual. Tsuyu was as unreadable as always. Bakugou was actually smiling. That was probably the creepiest thing Shouto had ever seen. Midoriya was still passed out with Uraraka and Iida trying to make sure he was ok.

Shouto himself couldn't wait to give his father this huge 'Fuck you'. While all of this reactioning was going on, the Judge and the pros had ironed out the details. They would be at their original homes most of the time (drat), while they alternated between the homes of each pro every other weekend.

After figuring out the rest of the details with the Judge, Shouto helped the rest of the Dekusquad (in his opinion Todorokisquad sounded cooler, but he only really hung out with Midoriya and Yoayorozu anyway) carry the still unconscious Midoriya back to the shuttle bus. Turns out Uraraka solved that problem by using her quirk on him and carried him back princess style.

"Lucky bastard," the GenEd kid complained, "I wanna get carried too..."

On the Bus ride back to UA, Shouto struck upon an idea sure to piss off his old man even more.

"Hey All Might?" He intoned.

"Yes Young Todoroki?"

"Can I call you Dad?"

All Might promptly passed out in the same way Midoriya (who was thankfully finally awake) had back in the courtroom. (Not a secret love child Shouto's ass, they're exactly the same).

In the end, they all ended up calling him 'Dad Might', and Mr. Aizawa became 'Eraser Dad' outside of school hours. According to Midoriya, this was the best year of his life, between getting to call All Might 'Dad' and actually having friends. (That earned him a group hug).


	2. Night of the Inventors Babies

Night of the Inventors Babies

Tenya Iida, Izuku Midoriya, Ochako Uraraka, Shouto Todoroki and Tsuyu Asui had permission to stay late in the classroom after school to work on their group project. They had until 7:00 PM to exit the main building and head back to the dorms before the automatic security system locked down the school, but the way things were progressing, they would be done the assignment before then. Tenya stood, stretching,

"I hate to leave the rest of you to finish this, but I have to use the restroom! I shall try to return quickly so you will not have to finish alone!" he said, chopping the air.

"It's fine Iida!" Ochako protested, "You've done more than your fair share."

"Ya!" exclaimed Izuku, "we're sure to get a good grade thanks to all your fantastic work. You're amazing Iida!"

Tenya beamed at the praise, while Ochako, Shouto and Tsuyu sweatdropped a little at Izuku's admiration for his friend.

"Thank you Midoriya! Though I cannot take all the praise! You too were an integral part of our group! As were you all!"

"No, Iida, it's all thanks to you!"

Before it could turn into a battle of who could out-compliment the other, Tsuyu cut in and broke it up.

"Iida, didn't you say you had to use the bathroom?"

Suddenly looking very squirmish, Tenya remembered why he had stood.

"Right, thanks for the reminder Asui!" and he speed walked out the door.

"Call me Tsu!" she called after him.

In the bathroom, Tenya was washing his hands when the lights cut out and he heard a shriek.

"Was that Uraraka?" Tenya pondered aloud, before taking off through the halls. 'I'm sorry, rules, for I have betrayed you!' Tenya thought, 'But one of my friends may be in trouble!' Tenya zipped into the classroom to the image of Ochako on Izuku's back floating, looking quite embarrassed while Tsuyu and Shouto snickered. Quickly assessing the situation, Tenya deduced Ochako had been surprised when the power cut out, and had jumped on Izuku while activating her quirk by mistake. After making sure their friends got down safely, they took stock of the situation, the room was dark, only lit by a small flame sustained in Shoutos hand and the glowing static of Izuku's quirk giving them light.

"I've texted Mr. Aizawa about the power," Shoto said, "He says we should just camp out in the school because the doors automatic locks will be active and he's too lazy to come get us"

"Thank you Todoroki!" Tenya chopped.

"What now class rep Iida?" asked Ochako.

"Well I suppose we should set up sleeping arrangements and procure comfortable bedding and snacks. We should split up since we have two people to light the way. Todoroki, come with me to the cafeteria, Midoriya, Uraraka and Tsu, you go and search for something we can use as bedding. We shall meet back here."

"Sounds good Class Rep!" everyone chorused.

However, before anyone could move, an explosion sounded in the distance, startling everyone.

"It's my worst nightmare!" Izuku yelped, "Kacchan's come to kill me!"

"Calm down Midoriya, Shouto monotoned, "that explosion came from the support department, not the entrance, Bakugou is back at the dorms."

"Right, sorry Todoroki, everyone," Izuku said.

"Change of plans, then, Midoriya, you and the girls check out that explosion, Todoroki and I will resume our original task!"

"Right!"

And with that everyone went off on their tasks. Things were progressing smoothly in the cafeteria. Aside from Shouto insisting on bringing back an unnecessary amount of Soba, they were in and out with their food and drink within ten minutes.

The pair were on the way back to the classroom when they ran into one very startled looking Tsuyu. Alarmed by the normally stoic Frog users expresion, Tenya quickly asked,

"What's wrong Tsu!?"

"It's Midoriya and Ochako! There was this crazy pink, THING that jumped us out of nowhere! It got the others, muttering something about advertisements and test subjects!"

"What happened Asui," Shouto calmly said in an attempt to calm Tsuyu down, "you have to tell us so we can help."

"Call me Tsu," she replied, "and it trapped them each in some kind of device! Its forcing Midoriya to do push ups and Ochako is floating over an electrically charged wire mesh net. They made me leave to get help before it got me too!"

"Well what are we waiting for! Todoroki, contact Aizawa and let him know there is a beast in the school, then we'll go save our friends!"

"Yes sir Class Rep!"

\--Meanwhile, with Izuku and Ochako…--

"Urmph, Dekuuu, I think I'm going to be sick sooonnn," Ochako moaned.

"Hold on Uraraka," Izuku said through the pain of so many push ups, "If i power up my quirk some more and go past my limit I should be able to shred this machine and then I can get you down."

"NO Deku! You'll hurt yourself!"

"But if I don't then you could fall into that shock net!"

"I can hold on a little longer, I promise, Tsu will be back with Iida and Todoroki soon, so long as they avoid the pink beast, we should be fine."

"But I don't want you to get sick Uraraka!"

"I told you I'll manage dek-"

The room was promptly covered in rainbow sparkle vomit. Izuku was fairly sure that wasn't normal, he'd have to ask uraraka if they got out of this.

\--—Back with Tenya and co-—-

"They should be up ahead," Tsuyu said as they navigated the dimly lit halls. Tenya was nervous, not that he would admit it, since he felt he had to stay strong for his friends. However, the dim lighting and uncertainty were getting to him, and he was jumping at all the little noises.

All of a sudden, something pink and disheveled scuttled across the floor just on the edge of the groups field of vision, causing them to jump and cling to one another. The creature scuttled around the edges of their vision while the future heroes stood stock still, terrified. Then, the sound of machinery whirred to life around them, and white powder began to fall around them. Almost instantly, Tsuyu began to sway on her feet, drowsy.

"Is this snow?" Tenya asked baffled.

Out of nowhere, a rocket powered weighted net shot towards Tenya, and would've caught him if Todoroki hadn't burned it.

"Iida run! Aizawa is on his way! I'll stay here and keep Asui from freezing with my quirk while you go and get help!" Shouto yelled ignoring Tsuyu's quiet 'c-call m-m-me Ts-Tsu'.

Tenya hated to leave his friends behind, but he had learned his lesson during the USJ incident and knew when to retreat. Activating his Engines, Tenya took off down the hall. However, his hopes were dashed when marbles slid out into his path and he could not stop in time.

Tenya slipped and slid straight into an open classroom. Hearing that same unnerving scuttling, Tenya wasted no time in scurrying into the nearest cabinet to hide, terrified. Desperately, Tenya tried to calm his breathing and stay quiet, but he could hear the scuttling outside, and that was not helping his nerves.

Just when Tenya thought the beast would fling open the doors and catch him, he heard the hum of the power coming back on and snarling and hissing. Mr. Aizawa's monotone voice reached Tenyas ears from outside.

"You can come out now Iida"

Slowly, Tenya peaked a head out of the cabinet and was shocked by what he saw. The pink scuttling beast was actually Mei Hatsumei, but something was off, she was snarling and foaming at the mouth, restrained by Aizawa's capture weapon. Then he noticed the other people in the room. A short circuited Denki was whey-ing in the corner, Eijiro was looking a little freaked out, while Hitoshi Shinsou from general studies just looked tired. Izuku and Ochako, though covered in sparkling rainbow vomit were fine, while Shouto was still warming up Tsuyu.

"What is going on?" Tenya asked. Surprisingly, it was Shinsou who spoke up,

"Every week Powerloader pays me to make Hatsumei sleep since she tends to you know, not, on her own. When she goes too long without sleeping, she gets like this. I was on my way to get her to go to bed, but found that she'd knocked out the power, so I came to get Eraser Head and some of your classmates to help me. Kirishima knocked down the door while Kaminari fixed the power." with his explanation finished, Hitoshi turned towards Mei and said,

"Hey, Hatsumei!"

She started to snarl in response, but then froze. Apparently that quantified as a response to activate Hitoshi's quirk.

"Go to bed," Hitoshi finished.Hatsumei promptly passed out, and Hitoshi began dragging her back to her dorm. "Catch you later Midoriya," he said on his way out.

"Um, ya. See ya…" Izuku replied looking just as confused as the other students.

"Well not that this hasn't been fun, but I want to go back to bed," Aizawa interrupted the silence. "Kirishima, Iida, Todoroki. Get your classmates back to the dorm. Midoriya, Uraraka, get cleaned up." And then he left. Eijiro turned to his friends, a puzzled look on his face,

"So wha-" he was cut off by Tenya and Shouto in unison.

"We will never speak of this day, understand Kirishima?"

"Uh, ok."


	3. Al Might’s Daycare

It was a routine patrol of the area. It wasn't All Mights normal territory, but he figured while he was in the area he might as well help out the local heroes in Musutafu and do a patrol. All Might leapt around buildings, keeping a watchful eye for crimes in progress when he heard a scream. Looking over, he saw what appeared to be a daycare center. "What kind of sick mind would attack a place of learning for youth!" thought All Might, before quickly leaping to their aid.

He quelled the attack rather quickly. It was just some low life thug who had robbed a nearby store and then decided the daycare center would make a good hiding place for whatever reason. All Might looked over the group of about 20 toddlers who looked back at them in awe while he waited for the teacher to finish giving the police her statement, it would be irresponsible to leave them unattended after all. A smaller boy with green hair tentatively inched closer to All Might, reverence apparent in his eyes, and seemed to be about to ask something before the officer making the arrest came back into the building with a grim look on his face.

"All Might," he began, "can we ask you a favour?"

"OF COURSE OFFICER!" he boomed, "WHAT DO YOU NEED OF ME!"

"The teacher is refusing to return to class, something about 'how these hellions seem to attract villains like magnets' and 'she won't spend another minute with them,' and well, we were wondering if you could watch the kids while the school finds a substitute?" the officer asked a little reluctantly.

"WHY IT WOULD BE MY PLEASURE! I LOVE CHILDREN!"

The officer sighed in relief. "Thanks All Might," he said. "This is why you're number one I suppose. You're always helping however you can."

Behind All MIght, the children's excitement was rising, and they began to break back into smaller groups as they ran off to play.

"I can't believe All Might is going to look after us!" said the small green haired boy. "Isn't this the coolest Kacchan?"

"For once we agree Deku," a blond boy replied. This is the best day ever! Even better than when I got my quirk!"

"We gotta show All Might our potential Kacchan! If he sees how hard working we are now, he'll have no choice but to take us on as his sidekicks when we get old enough!"

"Ya, especially once you get your Quirk. Still won't be as cool as mine!"

"We'll see. Anyway, let's build a super tall tower. That should show him how good we are!"

Meanwhile, the other children were beginning their own mischief. A floating set of clothes began to climb on top of a boy with a fluffy tipped tail, who began to cry in confusion and discomfort. A boy with blue hair and glasses was yelling loudly about not running in doors at a boy with blonde hair with a black bolt shaped streak chased a girl with purple hair with lighter wavy streaks. A boy with red and white hair and a bandage over his left eye was hiding in a corner while a well dressed girl with black hair tried to coax him out to come and play. A girl with long green hair and a tadpole tail was literally climbing the walls, while a black haired boy with funny elbows taped a very small boy with purple balls on his head to the highest shelves.

All Might turned and saw all this and began to wonder just what he had gotten himself into. With his expert heroic judgement, he deemed the girl on the ceiling and the boy taped to the shelves to be his highest priorities. All Might moved quickly to catch the tadpole girl before she could fall, but it seemed she did not want to be caught, as she managed to skirt just outside his reach every time he attempted to grab her. Since she seemed to be in no danger of falling, at the moment, All Might focussed his attention towards the other large problem. Getting down the small purple boy. The boy, whose name he learned was Minoru Mineta, was trussed up in tape from his feet to his neck. Carefully, All might pulled the boy down and began tearing off the tape as gently as he could, though it still elicited yelps of pain from the poor boy. When he was finished, there was more tape stuck to All Might than in the garbage, but at least young Mineta was free to go back to playing. With that taken care of, he returned his gaze to the ceiling to find the tadpole girl staring at him.

"Ribbit," she said.

"HELLO MY GIRL!" All Might began, still slightly panicked, "MAY I PLEASE ASK YOUR NAME AND FOR YOU TO COME DOWN?"

The girl ribbeted again, before saying, "You can call me Tsuyu, and everything down there is kind of scary Mr. All Might. Everyone is running around and I don't want to get hurt."

"WELL YOUNG TSUYU, CAN I OFFER YOU A PLACE ON MY SHOULDERS?"

"Ribbit," She agreed.

With that settled, All Might began looking around to find the boy with strange elbows so he could explain why his actions in tying up young Mineta were wrong. Instead he heard a shout, and found the blue haired boy tackling the blonde boy and purple haired girl to the ground.

As All Might walked over, the situation became clear. The smaller boy and girl with, now near tears after being knocked over like that were sitting together on the floor while the larger blue haired boy berated them for running inside. All MIght sighed, and sat down next to the kids.

"My young friends," he said in a much softer voice than his usual hearty boom, so as to avoid sending the two children near tears into a fit, "What seems to be the problem?"

The blonde boy sniffed, before saying, "Me n' Kyoka were playin, and then Iida came and knocked us down!" The girl, now identified as young Kyoka, nodded with tears in her eyes. Young Tsuyu, who All Might had already forgotten was there, climbed off his back and wrapped both the blonde boy and young Kyoka in a hug. The blue haired boy named Iida looked quite baffled for his part.

"Young Iida," All Might asked, "Were you aware that you could have hurt your friends here when you knocked them down? I am aware that you were trying to keep them from breaking the rules, and while that is kind, you must remember that these two are smaller than you and that using force is not how we should be solving our problems"

"I-I had no idea, Mr. All Might," he replied in a shocked manner, before quickly turning to his classmates and apologizing, "I am very sorry Kaminari and Jiro! Please forgive me!"

'Family names,' All Might thought to himself, 'he must not be as close as these two.'

Elsewhere, as All Might explained to the three that tag was an outside game and that tackling people was not okay, a very pink girl was dragging a timid looking boy with black hair and a scar on his eyebrow to play in the sand table with her, startling a boy with a bird shaped head and boy with multiple arms who had been calmly reading a picture book as the pink hurricane tore through. It was these boys beginning to cry that alerted All Might to his next task.

All Might quickly dashed over to the two boys to comfort them. The boy with multiple arms was still coherent enough to inform him of their names, Fumikage Tokoyami was the bird headed boy, and the tentacles boy was Mezo Shouji. He also told All Might the source of his distress. Still carrying the boys, he walked over to the excitable pink girl and shy boy. Looking up from the sand table, the pink girl noticed All Might coming over and got excited.

"Eiji look!" She said, "It's All Might!"

The boy, shocked, stood at attention. "Ei- Eijiro Kirishima sir! It's an honour to meet you!" Before All Might could get in a word however, the pink girl burst into giggles.

"You're silly Eiji!" She got out between laughs.

"Miiiinaaaaaa!" He complained, "Don't embarrass me in front of Mr. All Might!

All Might cut in before the two could continue their banter. "IT'S QUITE ALRIGHT YOUNG KIRISHIMA!!

As he gently rocked the boys to get them to stop crying, he noticed a problem he probably he should've taken care of earlier. The boy with the tail was now wailing and the invisible child seemed to be attempting to cuddle him in the most violent manner All Might had ever seen. Now that the two boys had been calmed, All Might ran to separate the two children. While all this was happening, All Might had somehow managed not to notice the most pressing issue.

The green haired boy known so far as Deku and his friend Kacchan had made an absurdly tall block tower. They had enlisted Deku's friend Ochako, a girl with brown hair and rosy cheeks, to help them finish their tower. This was necessary because the boys tower had nearly reached the ceiling, and they were perched precariously on top. Ochako's Quirk allowed her to make objects float, so she was using it to float the blocks up to her classmates.

"This way I can show my parents I can help them with their building!" She had said. The boys were simply grateful for the help because they didn't know how to get down.

Soon, the boys had finished their tower, which now reached all the way to the ceiling. The boys called out to All Might, who at this point was checking up on the boy with red and white hair, who had not been persuaded to leave his corner, but the same girl from before was reading a picture book with him. All Might turned, and was shocked by what he saw. Deku had gotten very excited and the tower had begun to shake.

"MY YOUNG FRIENDS!" All Might yelled in terror, "YOU MUST GET DOWN! I'M COMING TO GET YOU NOW, STAY PUT!"

Unfortunately for him, Ochako had gone past her limit, and in her nausea she had puked sparkling rainbow vomit all over the place. As All Might dashed to the boys rescue, he slipped in the vomit and took the tower down himself. The boys landed safely on his chest, laughing all the while.

"Wasn't our tower awesome All Might?!" The two yelled in unison, "We worked super hard so we could prove we were worthy to be your sidekicks!"

"WELL YOUNG LADS, YOU CERTAINLY SHOWED THIS OLD MAN SOMETHING, I WILL KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR YOUR PROGRESS ON YOUR PATHS TO HEROISM!"

The boys were elated at the praise. Deku scrambled to help Ochako clean up, while Kacchan went to go and brag to the other students. All Might sat up, a little dazed, 'Man, taking care of kids is hard,' he thought. Glancing around, he noticed a sparkly blond boy wearing frilly clothes looking like he was about to touch the sparkly vomit on the ground. Letting out a very unheroic shriek, All Might dashed to scoop up the boy and set out to find something to clean up the mess with.

All Might went home that day very tired. He had received quite the scolding from Nighteye for not checking in at the agency. He had forgotten with all the commotion with the children. Furthermore, two more villains had attacked the class throughout the day, not that they posed a threat to All MIght. He had learned that ever since this class had been put together there had been at least one villain attack per day, and following the events of today, the school board planned to separate the children into different classes to mitigate damage. All Might flopped onto his bed, and was asleep before he even hit the pillow. All Might had nightmares about being chased by about 20 children that night.

Several years later…

There had been another Villain attack on his students, and to put it lightly, Toshinori was not pleased. Some misguided fool seeking recognition from the League of Villains had snuck up on the students during a class outing and used his quirk on them. A Pro Hero onsite had easily taken care of the situation, but it was too late. Fortunately no one was hurt, but the authorities on the scene seemed reluctant to share exactly what had happened. Since the rest of the staff was busy they had sent Toshinori to pick up the students.

When Toshinori walked into the room and saw 20 very familiar toddlers, several memories came rushing back all at once.

Toshinori screamed.


	4. Breaking All For One

**I wrote this instead of sleeping. When inspiration strikes, the pen flows and the story writes itself. Sorry for any mistakes. It's 1:00 am for me. Let me know what you think. Without further adieux, I give you:**

Breaking One For All

"Are you sure this will work? " the guard asked.

"Trust me," Principal Nezu replied, "if this won't make him talk, nothing will. Open the door and send him in"

* * *

Down in All For Ones cell, the super villain smirked. The heroes attempts at pressing him for information had been laughable thus far, and if his timing was correct, he figured it was about time for them to try again. No matter. Whatever they tried would be a fruitless endeavour. So it was much to his surprise, not that he allowed his face to show it, when the door opened to reveal not some hero with a specific quirk or a police officer of some sort, or even All Might once again. No, while this individual was blonde like his arch-nemesis, he was also a teenager, and wearing casual clothes.

He laughed, "this is the heroes grand scheme? Sending a boy to talk to me? Absolutely entertaining. Well boy please get it over with. Make me laugh some more. "

"Ok," the boy said, "my name is Denki Kaminari, but you can call me Chargebolt. What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?"

All For One faltered.

"Wh- what?" He said.

The boy, now known to him as Chargebolt, mistook his confusion as a response, and continued, "Elephino!" Before he himself begin to crack up at his own joke.

"What?" All For One repeated himself.

"Oh it's easy really, the 'eleph' from elephant sounds like 'hell if' and 'ino' from rhino sounds like 'I know', get it?"

"Pardon me?"

"Man, I thought you were supposed to be scary! I mean, you fought All Might to a standstill and seemed like this big villain mastermind but you've gotta be even dumber than me if you don't get my joke, I mean it's-"

All For One tuned him out at that point. Was this the heroes plan? Destroy his brain cells through the sheer stupidity of this boys blathering? What he wouldn't give to be unrestrained. Whatever Quirk the boy had would be his and he could leave this ridiculous prison, but no, his plans required him to stay longer, and-

"Hey are you listening?" Chargebolt interrupted his musings, "I was just saying that you look really messed up. Like a potato or something."

All For One would never admit it, but that one kinda hurt his feelings.

"Not only that, but your eyes are gone! That's weird dude. How did you even know I was a guy? Do you have like, echolocomotion or something?" That's kinda neat. Too bad you're such a sucky villain, cause that would be great for rescue work-"

"I'm sorry, but did you just cal me, the greatest villain this world has ever seen, a 'sucky villain'?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, you're supposed to be the big, bad mastermind that doesn't get caught until the very end of the story when the up and coming hero finally finishes their training and fulfils their destiny, but you got beat by the mentor character! I mean, have you even seen Star Wars? Obi Wan died for a reason you know, you dumb sack of villainous incompetence."

'Oh my lord.' All For One thought time himself, 'they're killing my brain cells. I can feel them dying one by one.'

"Hey!" Chargebolt snapped his fingers as close the the super villains face as he could, "Stop zoning me out! I'm kinda talking here and that's super rude! Honestly did your mother never teach you manners? and I thought Kacchan was rude, what with him screaming all the time. But you certainly take the cake. You even had the audacity to parade around in a suit like you're James Bond or some other fancy guy with a suit, but your dumb as bricks! What a waste of my time! I should be back at school, taking ass and kicking names-

'Oh my lord, he said that unironically'

-and then I'll be able to tell All Might that his nemesis or whatever your supposed to be to him is a big joke! Honestly Dr. Doofensmirtz is a better villain than you at this point. At least he has redeeming qualities that make him interesting like being a good parent, but you're just evil and dumb. Honestly I bet Midoribro could've beaten you back when he was still breaking his fingers just 'cause he's so smart, and your so dumb. Like, on a scale of dumbness from me to Patrick star, me being the high end of the spectrum by the way, you must rank below the fictional star fish. I came here thinking you were gunna be all sneaky and try and trick me into telling you stuff, you'd have never done it by the way, but here you are staring (I think?) with your mouth wide open! You're not sleeping are you? Oh good you're awake. As I was saying, you're basically the worst big bad I've ever seen. Even Sword Art Online's villains had better motivations than you Mr. 'boo hoo, All Might stoke my thunder!' It's honestly pretty embarrassing, I mean-"

Picking his Jaw off the floor, All For One interrupted the young hero in training and loudly announced, "I give up! I'll tell you everything so long as you don't have this imbecile kill any more of my brain cells!"

"Hey buddy, we've already established you're the imbecile here."

All For One would've face-palmed had he been able, honestly he was tempted to try even if it would set the guns trained on him to high alert. It might've even put him out of his misery. He was honestly tempted to scream in frustration, but that would ruin his reputation.

Over the intercom, Nezu called out to his student.

"Well done, Chargebolt! Well done! That's all for now my young student! We thank you for your service!"

"Can I have that cookie I was promised now?"

"Of course my friend. And you'll get that extra credit too."


End file.
